The schadenfreude thread...

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gnome
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The schadenfreude thread...

Post by gnome »

I'll get the ball rolling...

Headed across a bridge in the left lane at a comfortable 5MPH above the speed limit. A pickup truck moves in behind me and begins to tailgate, obviously impatient with my progress.

I'm not as ornery as I used to be, and I've had it impressed on me that it's polite to move right if you're not as fast as the people behind you in the fast lane. So I do so. He zips on past me, followed by a white car with multiple antenna on top.

SO points out that the white car is an unmarked police cruiser, and about 30 seconds later he turns his lights on and pulls the guy over.

I had to resist the urge to wave as I went past.
"If fighting is sure to result in victory, then you must fight! Sun Tzu said that, and I'd say he knows a little bit more about fighting than you do, pal, because he invented it, and then he perfected it so that no living man could best him in the ring of honor. Then, he used his fight money to buy two of every animal on earth, and then he herded them onto a boat, and then he beat the crap out of every single one. And from that day forward any time a bunch of animals are together in one place it's called a zoo! (Beat) Unless it's a farm!"
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Post by hammegk »

Some years ago, about this time of year ... I20 100 mi east of Dallas ... 30 deg in an ice storm ... a pickup managed to pass me going backwards on the ice at about 50 mph ... I did wave at him in the ditch as I went past.
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Post by a.s. shole »

I watched in amazement at a guy who passed me illegally on a two lane road run over those "flexible" lane dividers and tear the oil pan out of his classic Nova. I followed an oil trail for about a half mile or so and just over a hill his car was off to the side of the road with a blown engine.

I honked, slowed down, and laughed at him. I felt bad for the car, though.
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Post by Nyarlathotep »

A couple of years ago I was driving on a stretch of highway with a 70mph speed limit. I see in my rearview mirror a blue pick-up driving very agressively, darting in and out of lanes, that sort of shit, he passe me like I was standing still. I was doing the speed limit at the time so he had to be doing at LEAST 90. I was quite content to let this maniac pass me.

Anyway, this particula stretch of road is pretty flat and I can see a long ways ahead. And I can still see him better than 100 yards ahead, driving like an idiot. Then a little jeep changes lanes infront of him to pass a slw moving truck...next thing I see is his brakelights come on, I see smoke coming from his tires and I see him go into a spin. Luckily the road isn't too crowded, so he doesn't collide with anyone and I am pretty far behind him at this point, so I was in no danger either.

Anyway, by the time I pass him, he is in the gully between the northbound and southbound lanes, all four tire flat and being "assisted" by a cop that pulled over from the other direction.

I couldn't resist the urge to make a little Nelson Muntz laugh as I went by.
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Re: The schadenfreude thread...

Post by JEROME DA GNOME »

gnome wrote: I'm not as ornery as I used to be, and I've had it impressed on me that it's polite to move right if you're not as fast as the people behind you in the fast lane.

Well done, I wish more people would drive as such.

I do drive fast, but I never tailgate and always move for cars that are traveling faster than I.


I was pulled over this summer by a Sheriff in an unmarked car for what I assumed was speeding. I passed him on the right because he was traveling too slow in the passing lane (it is a passing lane, NOT a fast lane). He did not give me a ticket and admitted to me that he was impeding my progress. He stated that he pulled me over because I gave him a dirty look.

:)
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Re: The schadenfreude thread...

Post by Bruce »

gnome wrote:I'll get the ball rolling...

Headed across a bridge in the left lane at a comfortable 5MPH above the speed limit. A pickup truck moves in behind me and begins to tailgate, obviously impatient with my progress.

I'm not as ornery as I used to be, and I've had it impressed on me that it's polite to move right if you're not as fast as the people behind you in the fast lane. So I do so. He zips on past me, followed by a white car with multiple antenna on top.

SO points out that the white car is an unmarked police cruiser, and about 30 seconds later he turns his lights on and pulls the guy over.

I had to resist the urge to wave as I went past.
Thank you for sharing that story. I can't count the number of times and impatient jackass has zipped past me, even when I'm already going 10 mph over the speed limit. There's never a cop around when it happens. At least now I know that it happens somewhere. :)
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Post by Mulebear »

2 or 3 Summers ago I was traveling down a two lane blacktop, when this asshole, too involved in a cell phone conversation, pulled out in front of me. I slammed on my brakes and honked my horn, but all he did was flip his middle finger at me.

About a mile down the road we had to stop at a red light. It was a hot day and we both had our windows down. He had his elbow sticking out the window while he continued to carry on a VERY loud conversation using his cell phone. About this time a large yellow jacket came buzzing around my window. I ignored the yellow jacket and it quickly moved away.

Well... The jacket zoomed away and immediately lighted on the guys elbow. The guy tried to swat it away and in doing so... He slung his cell phone onto the pavement... Right under the wheel of a car that had just turned onto the road.

It was most excellent.
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Post by JEROME DA GNOME »

Mulebear wrote:... pulled out in front of me. I slammed on my brakes and honked my horn, but all he did was flip his middle finger at me.

Maybe you should not have honked your horn.


You are the asshole initiation.


Typical for you, no wonder you have a hard time ITRL also.
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Post by Mulebear »

MILDRED THE TROLL wrote:You are the asshole initiation.
JEROME DADDY'S BABY wrote:You do nothing other than support your Statist views through sandbox name-calling.
CUNTTARD wrote:How am I hypocritical?
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Post by En folkefiende »

hammegk wrote:Some years ago, about this time of year ... I20 100 mi east of Dallas ... 30 deg in an ice storm ... a pickup managed to pass me going backwards on the ice at about 50 mph ... I did wave at him in the ditch as I went past.
Heh, did that in NJ a few years ago. Guy went zipping past me at about 50 mph in an ice storm. Passed him 5 minutes later, he was actually on the far side of the ditch, car and all... I'm not quite sure how he accmplished that, but all 4 tires were sunk to the body of the car in mud and he couldn't open the door. We called him some help.
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Post by JEROME DA GNOME »

Mulebear wrote:
MILDRED THE TROLL wrote:You are the asshole initiation.
JEROME DADDY'S BABY wrote:You do nothing other than support your Statist views through sandbox name-calling.
CUNTTARD wrote:How am I hypocritical?

Very clumsy.



Everyone can see why you have road rage.
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Post by JEROME DA GNOME »

jj wrote:We called him some help.
That is proper.

It was wrong for the others to express their spite for other humans that had had an accident.
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Post by Mulebear »

JEROME DA GNOME wrote:
Mulebear wrote:
MILDRED THE TROLL wrote:You are the asshole initiation.
JEROME DADDY'S BABY wrote:You do nothing other than support your Statist views through sandbox name-calling.
CUNTTARD wrote:How am I hypocritical?

Very clumsy.



Everyone can see why you have road rage.
Uh huh. :roll:

Besides being a clueless Troll... You really are stupid.
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Post by a.s. shole »

JEROME DA GNOME wrote:
jj wrote:We called him some help.
That is proper.

It was wrong for the others to express their spite for other humans that had had an accident.
You'll either get over it or you won't. Matters not to me either way.
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Post by JEROME DA GNOME »

Mulebear wrote:
JEROME DA GNOME wrote:
Mulebear wrote:
MILDRED THE TROLL wrote:You are the asshole initiation.
JEROME DADDY'S BABY wrote:You do nothing other than support your Statist views through sandbox name-calling.
CUNTTARD wrote:How am I hypocritical?

Very clumsy.



Everyone can see why you have road rage.
Uh huh. :roll:

Besides being a clueless Troll... You really are stupid.



Keep honking your horn at drivers.


You are a sad loser and you know it.

All you have is internet insults and car horn honking.



Sorry about your choices.
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Post by En folkefiende »

a.s. shole wrote:
JEROME DA GNOME wrote:
jj wrote:We called him some help.
That is proper.

It was wrong for the others to express their spite for other humans that had had an accident.
You'll either get over it or you won't. Matters not to me either way.
Millie Jermoe doesn't seem to understand the idea of consequences, she just keeps on spewing bile upon bile.

Then she wonders why we all dislike her so much.
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Post by JEROME DA GNOME »

jj wrote: Millie Jermoe doesn't seem to understand the idea of consequences, she just keeps on spewing bile upon bile.

Then she wonders why we all dislike her so much.

But JJ, was it not you advocating the removal of those that had the wrong ideas at TOP?


Sorry, you fail in your attempt to place blame elsewhere.
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Post by JEROME DA GNOME »

I think the Obamanics have come to the realization that he is not the Saviour.

They do not understand why they are not now happy, he promised!

It is like coming down from an opiate. I honestly do feel sorry for them.
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Post by Mulebear »

JEROME DA GNOME wrote:
Mulebear wrote:
JEROME DA GNOME wrote:
Mulebear wrote:
MILDRED THE TROLL wrote:You are the asshole initiation.
JEROME DADDY'S BABY wrote:You do nothing other than support your Statist views through sandbox name-calling.
CUNTTARD wrote:How am I hypocritical?

Very clumsy.



Everyone can see why you have road rage.
Uh huh. :roll:

Besides being a clueless Troll... You really are stupid.



Keep honking your horn at drivers.


You are a sad loser and you know it.

All you have is internet insults and car horn honking.



Sorry about your choices.
And all you have is Trolling and stupidity.

Oh... And a tiny penis.
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Post by En folkefiende »

Scheudenfroide shoener gotterfunken
Tochter aus elisyum!

Or something like that.
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Post by Bearguin »

Ignoring the cunt above,

I still get more pissed off at the guys who drive under the speed limit until they come to a passing lane.

A lot of the highways here in BC are one lane either way, not passing. They are neither flat or straight and trying to pass is often a good way to get yourself killed. But every so often, a passing lane has been added with signs, keep right except to pass.

So you come up behind someone doing under the speed limit (usually 80 kmh in a 90 kmh zone) and wait patiently until you come to a passing lane. Then they have the stupidity to speed up to 110. You know damn well they will be back to 80 one the passing lane ends. These are the ones who really piss me off.
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Post by Mentat »

I somehow manage to usually get stuck behind the guy wanting to go 15 mph below the speed limit and in front of the guy wanting to go 15 mph above the speed limit.

I thought it was a combination of confirmation bias and really bad chance, until I heard about density distributions.
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Post by hammegk »

JUst basic queueing theory in action.
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Post by Cool Hand »

Mentat wrote: I thought it was a combination of confirmation bias and really bad chance, until I heard about density distributions.
Fascinating stuff. The accordion effect in heavy traffic is very interesting.

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Re: The schadenfreude thread...

Post by gnome »

JEROME DA GNOME wrote:I passed him on the right because he was traveling too slow in the passing lane (it is a passing lane, NOT a fast lane).
Cool story. But, I do take issue with the "passing lane/fast lane" business. I understand defaulting to the right, especially in light traffic. But in moderate to heavy traffic, both lanes are intended to be used continuously, not only when passing. It doesn't make sense if I'm in a sparse line of cars going 45, and I'm going 55, to duck behind each car as I move past.

But that could start a whole argument and that isn't what the thread is for :)

By the way, I didn't mean to limit this to driving stories. :) Any time someone gets their comeuppance and you witness it is fine.
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Post by gnome »

Bearguin wrote:Ignoring the cunt above,

I still get more pissed off at the guys who drive under the speed limit until they come to a passing lane.

A lot of the highways here in BC are one lane either way, not passing. They are neither flat or straight and trying to pass is often a good way to get yourself killed. But every so often, a passing lane has been added with signs, keep right except to pass.

So you come up behind someone doing under the speed limit (usually 80 kmh in a 90 kmh zone) and wait patiently until you come to a passing lane. Then they have the stupidity to speed up to 110. You know damn well they will be back to 80 one the passing lane ends. These are the ones who really piss me off.
Funny thing is, as annoying as it is I think I get it.
When you're in one lane, driving faster is a bit scarier. So I can totally see people driving faster in two-lane traffic than one-lane traffic. It would be nice though for some situational awareness to let people around them.
"If fighting is sure to result in victory, then you must fight! Sun Tzu said that, and I'd say he knows a little bit more about fighting than you do, pal, because he invented it, and then he perfected it so that no living man could best him in the ring of honor. Then, he used his fight money to buy two of every animal on earth, and then he herded them onto a boat, and then he beat the crap out of every single one. And from that day forward any time a bunch of animals are together in one place it's called a zoo! (Beat) Unless it's a farm!"
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Post by DrMatt »

Around here in the 4-lane highways, there's often very little room for merge-ins after hairpinned on-ramps. So driving in the inner ("fast") lane most of the way is the natural default, just to avoid interaction with drivers entering the highway at half the posted limit. On my way to work there's one on-ramp where I can get blocked from the highway altogether by just one double-trailer truck, and if that happens, I continue into the offramp and go around the block and try again. It's called "23 at Washtenaw", for the curious.

I've seen some odd things--can't tell whether they were comeuppance, though.

In one case, a semi exited the highway at exactly that point, cutting off people on the entrance ramp and then rolling over the guard rail as the exit ramp from 23 to Washtenaw began to curve. Traffic on the highway was slowed to a crawl for a while as cranes and ambulances and helicopters were scrambled to the site.

A few years later, I merged into the ten-lane 275 northbound from 14 East in the middle of a combination winter icestorm and pea-soup fog. Some guy behind me in an SUV merged into 275 N from 14 W far behind me, then shifted into my lane. He apparently wanted to go 80 in the posted 70 despite conditions that I and all the drivers around me had, by consensus, decided to drive at 50. I saw his lights start to grow rapidly in my rear-view mirror and I got ready to take my feet off the pedals and steer towards whichever direction I was already going, in case he hit me and caused a spin. Suddenly, just as he was getting scarily close behind me, he apparently realized my taillights were real. I was able to pull my attention away from the windshield in brief flickers first to see his car start to pace behind mine while slowly rotating to the right (outside), then--on my next glance--I saw his car cut almost perpendicular to the highway from far to the right of me out off the highway into a snowbank 3 lanes over on the left. Immediately after that, I went through an underpass. He was very lucky--he'd skidded right, regained some small traction, then crossed 4 or 5 busy lanes of highway to the left under minimal visibility without colliding with anybody else and without ramming into a bridge pier. But I got off the highway and drove slow side streets to my destination as soon as I could.

On a trip from Ann Arbor to Chicago I saw a state cop with flashers on behind me, so I got to the right lane and it whizzed past me and got behind a Cadillac. The Caddy just kept going where it was for several minutes, then slowly started coming to the right with the cop car following it all the way to the right lane. I don't know whether the Caddy was the cop's target or they just got in trouble for obstructing the cop on the cop's way to some other scene, but I'd guess the latter.
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Post by DrMatt »

jj wrote:Scheudenfroide shoener gotterfunken
Tochter aus elisyum!

Or something like that.
It's all well and good until somebody pokes out a kettledrum head.
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Re: The schadenfreude thread...

Post by JEROME DA GNOME »

gnome wrote:
JEROME DA GNOME wrote:I passed him on the right because he was traveling too slow in the passing lane (it is a passing lane, NOT a fast lane).
Cool story. But, I do take issue with the "passing lane/fast lane" business. I understand defaulting to the right, especially in light traffic. But in moderate to heavy traffic, both lanes are intended to be used continuously, not only when passing. It doesn't make sense if I'm in a sparse line of cars going 45, and I'm going 55, to duck behind each car as I move past.

I drive on four and five lane highways in the D.C. Metro area. There is never a reason to drive the speed limit in the left lane.
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Post by JEROME DA GNOME »

gnome wrote: It would be nice though for some situational awareness to let people around them.

Agreed.
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Re: The schadenfreude thread...

Post by gnome »

JEROME DA GNOME wrote:
gnome wrote:
JEROME DA GNOME wrote:I passed him on the right because he was traveling too slow in the passing lane (it is a passing lane, NOT a fast lane).
Cool story. But, I do take issue with the "passing lane/fast lane" business. I understand defaulting to the right, especially in light traffic. But in moderate to heavy traffic, both lanes are intended to be used continuously, not only when passing. It doesn't make sense if I'm in a sparse line of cars going 45, and I'm going 55, to duck behind each car as I move past.

I drive on four and five lane highways in the D.C. Metro area. There is never a reason to drive the speed limit in the left lane.
I think that's compatible with what I said.
"If fighting is sure to result in victory, then you must fight! Sun Tzu said that, and I'd say he knows a little bit more about fighting than you do, pal, because he invented it, and then he perfected it so that no living man could best him in the ring of honor. Then, he used his fight money to buy two of every animal on earth, and then he herded them onto a boat, and then he beat the crap out of every single one. And from that day forward any time a bunch of animals are together in one place it's called a zoo! (Beat) Unless it's a farm!"
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Post by sparks »

Mildred The Cunttard has been quoted as saying:
I drive on four and five lane highways in the D.C. Metro area. There is never a reason to drive the speed limit in the left lane.
With the possible exception that it's the law. I'm afraid I'm going to have to turn you in to T3h Authoriteez and have you charged with terminal stupidity.

BTW: How's that job creation thing coming along there, Asshat?
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Post by JEROME DA GNOME »

sparks wrote:Mildred The Cunttard has been quoted as saying:
I drive on four and five lane highways in the D.C. Metro area. There is never a reason to drive the speed limit in the left lane.
With the possible exception that it's the law. I'm afraid I'm going to have to turn you in to T3h Authoriteez and have you charged with terminal stupidity.

BTW: How's that job creation thing coming along there, Asshat?


No one drives the limit on these highways, we drive the safe speed.

Only morons like you would stay under the limit, thus ignoring the hazard that you are presenting to the other drivers on the road.



Sad selfish child.
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Re: The schadenfreude thread...

Post by JEROME DA GNOME »

gnome wrote:
JEROME DA GNOME wrote:
gnome wrote:
JEROME DA GNOME wrote:I passed him on the right because he was traveling too slow in the passing lane (it is a passing lane, NOT a fast lane).
Cool story. But, I do take issue with the "passing lane/fast lane" business. I understand defaulting to the right, especially in light traffic. But in moderate to heavy traffic, both lanes are intended to be used continuously, not only when passing. It doesn't make sense if I'm in a sparse line of cars going 45, and I'm going 55, to duck behind each car as I move past.

I drive on four and five lane highways in the D.C. Metro area. There is never a reason to drive the speed limit in the left lane.
I think that's compatible with what I said.
Not arguing, just clarifying.

:)
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Post by asthmatic camel »

Some years ago , when I was running a pub, one of my customers was a very large, obnoxious skinhead who delighted in picking on people who were smaller than he. One day he started having a go at a seemingly inoffensive little guy for no apparent reason.

Said little guy turned out to be a professional boxer who took the skinhead outside, leathered seven shades of shit out of him, picked him up and threw him, barely conscious, into a skip (dumpster).

Oh, how we laughed. The skinhead has been known as "Skippy" ever since.

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Post by Bearguin »

gnome wrote:
Bearguin wrote:Ignoring the cunt above,

I still get more pissed off at the guys who drive under the speed limit until they come to a passing lane.

A lot of the highways here in BC are one lane either way, not passing. They are neither flat or straight and trying to pass is often a good way to get yourself killed. But every so often, a passing lane has been added with signs, keep right except to pass.

So you come up behind someone doing under the speed limit (usually 80 kmh in a 90 kmh zone) and wait patiently until you come to a passing lane. Then they have the stupidity to speed up to 110. You know damn well they will be back to 80 one the passing lane ends. These are the ones who really piss me off.
Funny thing is, as annoying as it is I think I get it.
When you're in one lane, driving faster is a bit scarier. So I can totally see people driving faster in two-lane traffic than one-lane traffic. It would be nice though for some situational awareness to let people around them.
Don't buy it. You don't go from 80 to 110 (KMH) for any other reason than being a dick.
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Post by eli54 »

Riding home after dark I was in a position where I could not go faster or change lanes safely. A guy in a short wheelbase lifted Jeep decided he wanted everyone to go faster. Usually when confronted with a tailgater and no place to go, I usually slow up a bit to increase the distance between me and the car ahead to be sure that the Jeep had room to stop if something happened in the rush hour traffic. He just got a little closer. Speed on the freeway picked up and he continued to follow dangerously close (for me). I pulled on the fron brake lever enough to make the brakelight come on and dropped the centerstand, showering him with sparks. Ever seen a Jeep in a 70 mph speed wobble? :D
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Re: The schadenfreude thread...

Post by Doctor X »

This is:



even I feel sorry for them.

No, seriously.

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