Why Florida is an awsome place to live

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Doctor X
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Re: Why Florida is an awsome place to live

Post by Doctor X » Sun Mar 03, 2019 6:09 am

So you have met Gram's Mom?




Thank you I just flew in and boy are my arms tired. . . .

--J.D.

P.S.
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here with his MAGA hat . . . probably.
Spoiler:
Incidentally, that page describes it as "delicious." The gaff topsail catfish, not Gram's Mom of course. . . .
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ed
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Re: Why Florida is an awsome place to live

Post by ed » Sun Mar 03, 2019 11:33 am

There were exactly 3 topsail catfish left in Florida, you killed one and the last two are males.

Thanks
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Abdul Alhazred
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Re: Why Florida is an awsome place to live

Post by Abdul Alhazred » Sun Mar 03, 2019 2:30 pm

I'd say proof of Intelligent Icky Design.

Just too icky to have evolved naturally. :BigGrin3:
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Anaxagoras
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Re: Why Florida is an awsome place to live

Post by Anaxagoras » Sun Mar 03, 2019 4:22 pm

WildCat wrote:
Sun Mar 03, 2019 3:50 am
Back in Florida today. Had a few hours of daylight to fish, I caught an absolutely disgusting fish. A gafftopsail catfish. They have venomous spines that will put you in a world of hurt for up to 6 months if they stick you, and when caught they produce a copious amount of slime. They are living proof that there is no God.
Kinda like hagfish slime?

Evidences against God, but for evolution I think. I'd like to have those defenses if I were a fish.
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Re: Why Florida is an awsome place to live

Post by sparks » Sun Mar 03, 2019 5:30 pm

Ah hell. They're just doing what they do. Just like us with nuclear weapons, the interwebz, Trump, Wildcat and ed. :)
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ed
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Re: Why Florida is an awsome place to live

Post by ed » Sun Mar 03, 2019 5:52 pm

WildCat wrote:
Sun Mar 03, 2019 3:50 am
Back in Florida today. Had a few hours of daylight to fish, I caught an absolutely disgusting fish. A gafftopsail catfish. They have venomous spines that will put you in a world of hurt for up to 6 months if they stick you, and when caught they produce a copious amount of slime. They are living proof that there is no God.
Our gentle native tribesmen rely on those fish for their sustenance. By culturally appropriating them, you are committing a patriarchal act of genocide.
take this image to bed with you tonight and ponder on your actions. :x :x :x :x
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Little Umgwwweea<click> will go to bed hungry tonight.

Thanks, white man.
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ed
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Re: Why Florida is an awsome place to live

Post by ed » Sun Mar 03, 2019 5:54 pm

and I do my bit. I allow Umgwwweea<click> and his kinship group (sadly depleted, there are only three of them) to hunt grubs and newts on the shores of Lake Ed. It is the least I can do. Literally, the least.
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Abdul Alhazred
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Re: Why Florida is an awsome place to live

Post by Abdul Alhazred » Sun Mar 03, 2019 6:25 pm

Grubs and newts, but not trilobites? :evil:
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ed
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Re: Why Florida is an awsome place to live

Post by ed » Sun Mar 03, 2019 6:36 pm

Those are protected, Cossack!!!
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Re: Why Florida is an awsome place to live

Post by ed » Sun Mar 03, 2019 6:41 pm

We have an annual event here, the "Running of the Natives". sorta like the central european event except natives, not jews. Everyone has a real good time. We let the natives feast on grubs after.
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Abdul Alhazred
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Re: Why Florida is an awsome place to live

Post by Abdul Alhazred » Sun Mar 03, 2019 6:48 pm

Hmm.

I Google image searched "natives of Florida" and got this:

Image
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ed
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Re: Why Florida is an awsome place to live

Post by ed » Sun Mar 03, 2019 6:50 pm

!
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Abdul Alhazred
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Re: Why Florida is an awsome place to live

Post by Abdul Alhazred » Sun Mar 03, 2019 7:00 pm

You can tell by the looks on their faces that they are getting into the trilobites and never mind about ed. :p
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Witness
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Re: Why Florida is an awsome place to live

Post by Witness » Mon Mar 04, 2019 4:23 am

ed wrote:
Sun Mar 03, 2019 6:41 pm
We have an annual event here, the "Running of the Natives". sorta like the central european event except natives, not jews. Everyone has a real good time. We let the natives feast on grubs after.
As in Sparta?

Image

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Abdul Alhazred
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Re: Why Florida is an awsome place to live

Post by Abdul Alhazred » Tue Mar 05, 2019 1:33 am

Hey ed!

You've got company. Another Noo Yaawker arrives.

AOC’s mom glad she ditched New York for lower-tax Florida
Washington Examiner
Rep. Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez’s, D-N.Y., mother doesn’t regret moving from New York to Florida in part due to the lower real estate taxes.

“I was paying $10,000 a year in real estate taxes up north,” Blanca Ocasio-Cortez told the Daily Mail. “I'm paying $600 a year in Florida. It's stress-free down here.”

...
Hmm. Not one of those Bronx renters who think the landlord is paying the tax not just collecting it.

Yorktown Heights. Isn't that where Gus Hall lived? Or am I confusing it with Bronxville? :BigGrin3:
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ed
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Re: Why Florida is an awsome place to live

Post by ed » Tue Mar 05, 2019 2:05 am

$10,000 a year in real estate taxes

Thats a serious white peoples tax levy. Who the fuck is this chick?
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WildCat
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Re: Why Florida is an awsome place to live

Post by WildCat » Tue Mar 05, 2019 3:41 am

Haven't had the greatest success fishing so far on this year's Florida trip. Only fish I caught that was a keeper was a speckled trout. Yesterday I caught a goliath grouper... all 10" of it. It was a baby.

But as I was filleting the trout I caught yesterday I noticed there were blue crabs under the dock. So I stuck the skin of one side of it on a jig head and cast it into the water near a crab. It grabbed it and refused to let go until it was within netting range, one blue crab in the bucket. Caught another one the same way and tonight's dinner was 2 trout fillets and 2 blue crabs. They were fantastic, best crabs I ever had (insert Anax mother joke here). Caught a 24" snook near Everglades City today, but that's 4"short of keeper size.
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sparks
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Re: Why Florida is an awsome place to live

Post by sparks » Tue Mar 05, 2019 10:13 pm

https://www.wftv.com/news/local/tsa-flo ... /927684962

"Florida man tries to board plane with grenade launcher"

ed? You've been warned about these sorts of pranks before mister! :)
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Witness
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Re: Why Florida is an awsome place to live

Post by Witness » Tue Mar 05, 2019 11:04 pm

You can read about Florida Man even in the Miami Herald now:
Matt Gaetz, who is Florida Man personified in Congress, is in big trouble now.

Your Florida Man has finally done it, Fort Walton Beach.

Congressman Matt Gaetz, proud representative of the Sunshine State’s First District, just made the evolution from plain old creepy behavior to tampering-with-a-witness territory.

A self-described “Libertarian-leaning Republican,” a champion of Florida as the new Wild West frontier, and all of 36 years old, Gaetz has finally worked his way up from infantile harassment of freshman U.S. Rep. Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez, D-New York, to getting into some real legal trouble.

Telling TMZ that he would “swipe right” — a reference to the dating app Tinder — for the opportunity to “write a cannabis bill with” Ocasio-Cortez isn’t illegal. Calling her the “attractive lady from Queens ”and trying to capitalize on her fame by association isn’t a crime. (Although put together it may be grounds for a restraining order and/or a psych evaluation.)

But witness tampering, now that’s really something.

Gaetz is supposed to be an attorney, so The Florida Bar has stepped in and is investigating Gaetz’s conduct for sending former Trump lawyer Michael Cohen a threatening tweet just before he was to appear before an open session of the House Oversight Committee to testify. He could face ethics sanctions from Congress as well.

Here’s what Gaetz tweeted:
“Hey @MichaelCohen212 — Do your wife & father-in-law know about your girlfriends? Maybe tonight would be a good time for that chat. I wonder if she’ll remain faithful when you’re in prison. She’s about to learn a lot…”
https://www.miamiherald.com/news/local/ ... 21779.html

So classy. :mrgreen:

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Abdul Alhazred
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Re: Why Florida is an awsome place to live

Post by Abdul Alhazred » Fri Mar 08, 2019 6:24 pm

Woman charged with stealing rental car says 'demons took it'
News 4 Jax
JACKSONVILLE, Fla. - A woman who was arrested after an SUV was stolen Thursday from an Ace Rent a Car on Jacksonville's Northside told News4Jax "the demons took it."

Gardinia McCullough, 23, appeared in court Friday morning on car theft charges, and her bond was set at just over $15,000. She was wearing a red jumpsuit, which indicates to guards in the jail that she needs extra attention, and she was not wearing a long-haired wig that she had on the night she was arrested.

...
The one thing I'd most like to know about this story is the one thing we can never know.

Was she telling the truth as she understood it, merely being defiant, or did she really think the excuse would be accepted by the authorities?
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