The UK thread

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asthmatic camel
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Re: The UK thread

Post by asthmatic camel »

I'm going to report you to Pyrrho, Abdul. I've already bought one harmonica this week and you're an enabler.

I'm considering taking legal action via my lawyers, Sue Grabbit and Run.

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Shit happens. The older you get, the more often shit happens. So you have to try not to give a shit even when you do. Because, if you give too many shits, you've created your own shit creek and there's no way out other than swimming through the shit. Oh, and fuck.
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Re: The UK thread

Post by asthmatic camel »

'Tis a thing of beauty, though, about the best Richter tuned diatonic harmonica money can buy.

Mrs. Camel pissed me off by picking it up and instantly learning how to play the blues scale.

*SIGH*
Shit happens. The older you get, the more often shit happens. So you have to try not to give a shit even when you do. Because, if you give too many shits, you've created your own shit creek and there's no way out other than swimming through the shit. Oh, and fuck.
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Re: The UK thread

Post by ed »

:shock:
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Re: The UK thread

Post by Giz »

Every [english] rose has it's thrawn.
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ed
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Re: The UK thread

Post by ed »

And that, sir, is a thrawn if ever I saw one.
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Witness
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Re: The UK thread

Post by Witness »

Back to serious stuff:

Image
BBC wrote:Camilla, Duchess of Cornwall, urges parents to read to children

Writing in the Sunday Express, Camilla spoke of the joy her father brought to her by reading to her every night.

She said: "Those evenings didn't just pass on a lifelong love of reading; they made me, too, want to share that passion with my children and now with my grandchildren."

The duchess was writing ahead of World Book Day on Thursday.

She said a day dedicated to books may seem "a bit old-fashioned" in a world "that sometimes feels dominated by too many screens and too much information".

But Camilla said it was a "timely reminder" of how important books and reading are, especially for children.
http://www.bbc.com/news/uk-43187669

:mrgreen:
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ed
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Re: The UK thread

Post by ed »

Shes right
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Witness
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Re: The UK thread

Post by Witness »

Abdul Alhazred wrote:I see time has treated her better than him.
Hmmm, not so sure about that. As one of my friends once said, "Women turn vinegar, for men it's sad old clown." :mrgreen:
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Witness
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Re: The UK thread

Post by Witness »

A bit old, but still fun:

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Re: The UK thread

Post by Witness »

The Independent wrote:UK world's largest producer of legal cannabis, finds UN body

Ninety five tonnes of marijuana was produced in the UK in 2016 for medicinal and scientific use, accounting for 44.9 per cent of the world total, its International Narcotics Control Board (INCB) found.

The UK is also the largest exporter of the drug, with 2.1 tonnes exported in 2016 – roughly 70 per cent of the world’s total, the report stated.

Recreational use of cannabis is illegal in the UK, but in recent years, there has been a growing interest in its using it for medicinal purposes.

A number of advocacy groups have called on the government to allow it to be used in treatments.

Drug policy reform group, Transform, criticised the government for being a mass producer while “consistently refusing to allow medical cannabis in the UK on the basis that it has ‘no therapeutic value’”.
http://www.independent.co.uk/news/uk/ho ... 43921.html
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Re: The UK thread

Post by sparks »

While it may not cure anything, it certainly assists in enduring others.
You can lead them to knowledge, but you can't make them think.
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Witness
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Re: The UK thread

Post by Witness »

Image

Yay Brexit! :mrgreen:
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asthmatic camel
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Re: The UK thread

Post by asthmatic camel »

Incidentally, you see how "Welfare" tops the list, with "State Pensions" coming in at No. 3? This is a highly misleading interpretation of reality by a government determined to paint benefit claimants as sponging, workshy malingerers. Back in the real world, well over a third of "Welfare" spending goes on government employee pensions: not what I'd call "welfare". The proportion spent on unemployment benefits is actually tiny, not that you'd think so if you listened to government propaganda...

Source.

Image
Shit happens. The older you get, the more often shit happens. So you have to try not to give a shit even when you do. Because, if you give too many shits, you've created your own shit creek and there's no way out other than swimming through the shit. Oh, and fuck.
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Re: The UK thread

Post by Doctor X »

What?

You expect your government to work for their pay?




Commie!

--J.D.
Mob of the Mean: Free beanie, cattle-prod and Charley Fan Club!
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asthmatic camel
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Re: The UK thread

Post by asthmatic camel »

I don't expect the government to work for its pay, (and extremely generous pensions.) Government employees, however, our doctors, nurses, teachers, armed forces, police, paramedics etc. work extremely hard for relatively low wages and for the benefit of all. Rewarding them with a fairly modest pension after what can now be fifty one years service is hardly unreasonable, is it?
Shit happens. The older you get, the more often shit happens. So you have to try not to give a shit even when you do. Because, if you give too many shits, you've created your own shit creek and there's no way out other than swimming through the shit. Oh, and fuck.
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Re: The UK thread

Post by Witness »

Image
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Re: The UK thread

Post by Giz »

Witness wrote:Image
We provided more countries with independence days than any other, and it’s still not enough. Ungrateful world. Sad!

http://www.livememe.com/1gsc5kx/good-gu ... countries/
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Re: The UK thread

Post by Grammatron »

Maybe we should bring some freedoms back to UK.

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Re: The UK thread

Post by Witness »

Image

London underground.
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Re: The UK thread

Post by Giz »

Witness wrote:Image

London underground.
Where do they think the hot air that drives their turbines comes from?
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Re: The UK thread

Post by Witness »

Giz wrote:Where do they think the hot air that drives their turbines comes from?
It's good that I read this during an intermission in my drinking, or I would have soiled screen & keyboard.

Have a :figamagee:
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Re: The UK thread

Post by gnome »

An odd version of it.

"I" usually stands for "Inspiring" in that slogan.
"If fighting is sure to result in victory, then you must fight! Sun Tzu said that, and I'd say he knows a little bit more about fighting than you do, pal, because he invented it, and then he perfected it so that no living man could best him in the ring of honor. Then, he used his fight money to buy two of every animal on earth, and then he herded them onto a boat, and then he beat the crap out of every single one. And from that day forward any time a bunch of animals are together in one place it's called a zoo! (Beat) Unless it's a farm!"
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Re: The UK thread

Post by ed »

The only thing government has any business commenting on is if its illegal.
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Re: The UK thread

Post by Giz »

Grammatron wrote:Maybe we should bring some freedoms back to UK.

Image
They need something to fill their time while they ignore:

https://www.google.com/amp/s/www.thesun ... ctims/amp/
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Re: The UK thread

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Politics Home wrote:Labour question Theresa May's vow to stand up to Russia amid Tory funding revelations

Russian oligarchs have registered donations of more than £820,000 to the Tories since Theresa May took over in July 2016 according to The Sunday Times.

The news comes after the Prime Minister pledged “action” against the Russian state if it was found to be responsible for the poisoning of former spy Sergei Skripal and his daughter, Yulia.

The paper found at least £253,950 came from Lubov Chernukhin, the wife of a former Moscow minister and a previous donor in September, while businessman Alexander Temerko, a former senior figure in Russia’s defence industry has handed the party £148,000 since 2016.

Overall the Tories have reportedly received more than £3m from Russian-linked tycoons, their companies and lobbyists since the coalition government came to power in 2010.
https://www.politicshome.com/news/uk/po ... -vow-stand
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Re: The UK thread

Post by Anaxagoras »

National Trust apologises to Cornish after appearing to endorse putting cream on scones first

Image
The offending image, published on the Lanhydrock House and Garden Facebook page, shows jam served on top of clotted cream. CREDIT: NATIONAL TRUST
Must be a joke, right? Oh, no, no, no, no. This is serious business.
The rivalry between Devon and Cornwall over the correct order of cream and jam on a scone is one of the country’s fiercest disputes, and locals are expected to know where their side stands.

A National Trust property in Cornwall therefore prompted understandable outrage after it advertised cream teas for Mother’s Day - with a photograph showing the cream being spread before the jam.

The advert, from Lanhydrock House and Garden, has been called “unacceptable”, “shocking” and “disgusting”, with some Cornish people threatening to cancel their memberships.
A fool thinks himself to be wise, but a wise man knows himself to be a fool.
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Re: The UK thread

Post by Witness »

Which two mighty powers have, as I was going to tell you, been engaged in a most obstinate war for six-and-thirty moons past. It began upon the following occasion. It is allowed on all hands, that the primitive way of breaking eggs, before we eat them, was upon the larger end; but his present majesty’s grandfather, while he was a boy, going to eat an egg, and breaking it according to the ancient practice, happened to cut one of his fingers. Whereupon the emperor his father published an edict, commanding all his subjects, upon great penalties, to break the smaller end of their eggs. The people so highly resented this law, that our histories tell us, there have been six rebellions raised on that account; wherein one emperor lost his life, and another his crown.
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Re: The UK thread

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Reminiscent of the Great Stilton Cheese row, (we take these things seriously.) Stilton cheese, a great favourite, may not be sold as such when it is produced in the village of Stilton, from which it gets its name.
Stilton is an English cheese, produced in two varieties: Blue, known for its characteristic strong smell and taste, and the lesser-known White. Both have been granted the status of a protected designation of origin by the European Commission, which requires that only cheese produced in the three counties of Derbyshire, Leicestershire, and Nottinghamshire and made according to a strict code may be called "Stilton". Thus cheese made in the village of Stilton which is now in Cambridgeshire (from where its name was derived in the 18th century) could not be sold as "Stilton".
:)
Shit happens. The older you get, the more often shit happens. So you have to try not to give a shit even when you do. Because, if you give too many shits, you've created your own shit creek and there's no way out other than swimming through the shit. Oh, and fuck.
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Re: The UK thread

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--J. "I Don't Care How Fucking "Runny" it is!" D.
Mob of the Mean: Free beanie, cattle-prod and Charley Fan Club!
"Doctor X is just treating you the way he treats everyone--as subhuman crap too dumb to breathe in after you breathe out." – Don
DocX: FTW. – sparks
"Doctor X wins again." – Pyrrho
"Never sorry to make a racist Fucktard cry." – His Humble MagNIfIcence
"It was the criticisms of Doc X, actually, that let me see more clearly how far the hypocrisy had gone." – clarsct
"I'd leave it up to Doctor X who has been a benevolent tyrant so far." – Grammatron
"Indeed you are a river to your people.
Shit. That's going to end up in your sig." – Pyrrho
"Try a twelve step program and accept Doctor X as your High Power." – asthmatic camel
"just like Doc X said." – gnome

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Re: The UK thread

Post by Witness »

Image

:?
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Re: The UK thread

Post by Anaxagoras »

I can't tell if it's pro-conformity or supposed to be mocking conformists.

Probably the latter.
A fool thinks himself to be wise, but a wise man knows himself to be a fool.
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Re: The UK thread

Post by Grammatron »

Anaxagoras wrote:I can't tell if it's pro-conformity or supposed to be mocking conformists.

Probably the latter.
Probably.

https://www.channel4.com/news/transport ... gn-spoofed
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Re: The UK thread

Post by Anaxagoras »

Ah, a "good manners" campaign usurped by pranksters.

Japan also has some posters in trains encouraging the passengers have good manners.

Image
A fool thinks himself to be wise, but a wise man knows himself to be a fool.
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Re: The UK thread

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Someone has got to have made one about not having sex on a train.

Being Humble--Yet MagNIfIcent--I searched and found cartoon versions of the anti-"chikan"--ちかん--or "molester" posters. Warnings about this, I am sure you know, exist.

The problem is I fortunately checked where they came from: Stormfront and a number of no one in particular and generic racist fucktard sites. After five of them I gave up. I do not know if the Japanese Original colored the chikan but, there you go. Black figure smiling as he gropes a girl to the horror of watching "not black" riders.

Somethings . . . how they go missed.

--J.D.
Mob of the Mean: Free beanie, cattle-prod and Charley Fan Club!
"Doctor X is just treating you the way he treats everyone--as subhuman crap too dumb to breathe in after you breathe out." – Don
DocX: FTW. – sparks
"Doctor X wins again." – Pyrrho
"Never sorry to make a racist Fucktard cry." – His Humble MagNIfIcence
"It was the criticisms of Doc X, actually, that let me see more clearly how far the hypocrisy had gone." – clarsct
"I'd leave it up to Doctor X who has been a benevolent tyrant so far." – Grammatron
"Indeed you are a river to your people.
Shit. That's going to end up in your sig." – Pyrrho
"Try a twelve step program and accept Doctor X as your High Power." – asthmatic camel
"just like Doc X said." – gnome

ImageWS CHAMPIONS X4!!!! ImageNBA CHAMPIONS!! Stanley Cup!Image SB CHAMPIONS X6!!!!!! Image
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Re: The UK thread

Post by gnome »

Grammatron wrote:
Anaxagoras wrote:I can't tell if it's pro-conformity or supposed to be mocking conformists.

Probably the latter.
Probably.

https://www.channel4.com/news/transport ... gn-spoofed
Maybe a bit of both? Like how Americans argue on facebook about pineapple on pizza like it's a serious issue. It isn't, but it's fun to pretend it is. It also provides an opportunity to release some harmless outrage which is not 100% made up, just understood to be frivolous.
"If fighting is sure to result in victory, then you must fight! Sun Tzu said that, and I'd say he knows a little bit more about fighting than you do, pal, because he invented it, and then he perfected it so that no living man could best him in the ring of honor. Then, he used his fight money to buy two of every animal on earth, and then he herded them onto a boat, and then he beat the crap out of every single one. And from that day forward any time a bunch of animals are together in one place it's called a zoo! (Beat) Unless it's a farm!"
--Soldier, TF2
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Re: The UK thread

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Indeed, given only fags would put a pineapple on pizza.

--J.D.
Mob of the Mean: Free beanie, cattle-prod and Charley Fan Club!
"Doctor X is just treating you the way he treats everyone--as subhuman crap too dumb to breathe in after you breathe out." – Don
DocX: FTW. – sparks
"Doctor X wins again." – Pyrrho
"Never sorry to make a racist Fucktard cry." – His Humble MagNIfIcence
"It was the criticisms of Doc X, actually, that let me see more clearly how far the hypocrisy had gone." – clarsct
"I'd leave it up to Doctor X who has been a benevolent tyrant so far." – Grammatron
"Indeed you are a river to your people.
Shit. That's going to end up in your sig." – Pyrrho
"Try a twelve step program and accept Doctor X as your High Power." – asthmatic camel
"just like Doc X said." – gnome

ImageWS CHAMPIONS X4!!!! ImageNBA CHAMPIONS!! Stanley Cup!Image SB CHAMPIONS X6!!!!!! Image
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Re: The UK thread

Post by Witness »

Good job, I couldn't find any source.
:figamagee:

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Re: The UK thread

Post by Witness »

Image
Spoiler:
Image
Shropshire Star wrote:Ironbridge Power Station petition goes global as people in America and France join the fight to save the station's iconic towers

The process of taking down the towers with controlled detonations is due to begin proper in Spring 2018.

Mr Morris said he was determined to put a stop to the plans by persuading the company to look at other options. He said: “They’re going to need two years and two million pounds to knock them down – why not spend a million and make it into a visitor’s attraction? Those towers are a part of Ironbridge history.

“We might not win but we have to try.”
https://www.shropshirestar.com/news/loc ... ic-towers/
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Re: The UK thread

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The Daily Fail wrote:Yes, sir! Former soldiers to get £40k bursaries to retrain as teachers in a bid to restore discipline in UK classrooms

Former soldiers will get £40,000 bursaries to retrain as teachers in a drive to restore discipline in the classroom, the Government has announced.

From September, all ex-servicemen and women will be able to apply for the money to do a teaching degree as long as they have the relevant A-levels.

The Department of Education hopes the veterans will bring a fresh perspective to their schools.

It means children could be taught by heroes from some of our most gruelling recent conflicts, including Afghanistan and Iraq.

The bursaries will be available for those who want to teach biology, chemistry, computing, maths or modern languages – subjects with teacher shortages.

Education secretary Damian Hinds said: ‘Our ex-servicemen and women … have a wealth of experience and expertise that can be shared in the classroom, teaching pupils the knowledge they need to succeed alongside vital skills, such as leadership and self-discipline.’

Defence Secretary Gavin Williamson added: ‘Through leadership, teamwork and problem-solving, veterans are ideally suited for a career in teaching once they leave the Armed Forces.’
http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article ... drive.html
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Re: The UK thread

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You can lead them to knowledge, but you can't make them think.