Dad jokes and humor

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Bruce
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Dad jokes and humor

Post by Bruce » Mon Apr 16, 2018 12:20 pm

I might not be the best dad in the world, but I was born for dad jokes. Gotta start documenting.

Dad, what's circular reasoning?
It' reasoning that circulates.
What is reasoning that circulates?
Circular reasoning.

:doglaugh:
Such potential!

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Abdul Alhazred
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Re: Dad jokes and humor

Post by Abdul Alhazred » Mon Apr 16, 2018 1:08 pm

"Eat your spinach or your eyeballs will fall out."

At five years old (liking spinach but aware of the stereotype) I thought it was screamingly funny.

But it sure got a rise out of Mom. :)
Image "If I turn in a sicko, will I get a reward?"

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shemp
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Re: Dad jokes and humor

Post by shemp » Tue Apr 17, 2018 3:06 am

"Hey you, pull up a couple of chairs and sit down!"

--------------------------------------------------------------

"Did you bring your lunch or did you come in the back door?"

--------------------------------------------------------------

Man gets on a bus with a banana in his ear. Driver says "Hey, you've got a banana in your ear!" "What?" "I said you've got a banana in your ear!" "What?" "You've got a banana in your ear!!!!" "I can't hear you, I've got a banana in my ear!"
"It is not I who is mad! It is I who is crazy!" -- Ren Hoek

Freedom of choice
Is what you got
Freedom from choice
Is what you want

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Bruce
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Re: Dad jokes and humor

Post by Bruce » Tue Apr 17, 2018 4:11 am

Pay attention, son. You have to remember to cross your eyes and dot your tees. If you rush like that you'll get those reversed. :D
Such potential!

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robinson
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Re: Dad jokes and humor

Post by robinson » Tue Apr 17, 2018 4:25 pm

A weasel walks into the bar. The bartender says wow! In all my years bar tending I’ve never seen a weasel in a bar before. What can I get for you?


























Pop, goes the weasel.
You never know what's going to happen

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sparks
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Location: Friar McWallclocks Bar -- Where time stands still while you lean over!

Re: Dad jokes and humor

Post by sparks » Tue Apr 17, 2018 8:44 pm

Pull my finger.
You can lead them to knowledge, but you can't make them think.

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Anaxagoras
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Re: Dad jokes and humor

Post by Anaxagoras » Wed Feb 13, 2019 1:12 pm

A fool thinks himself to be wise, but a wise man knows himself to be a fool.
William Shakespeare

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Rob Lister
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Re: Dad jokes and humor

Post by Rob Lister » Wed Feb 13, 2019 1:47 pm

Anaxagoras wrote:
Wed Feb 13, 2019 1:12 pm
It took a while.

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Anaxagoras
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Location: Yokohama/Tokyo, Japan

Re: Dad jokes and humor

Post by Anaxagoras » Wed Feb 13, 2019 2:34 pm

Don't want to ruin it or anything, but:
Spoiler:
A common dad joke:
Kid: Dad, I'm hungry!
Dad: Hi Hungry, I'm Dad!
Kid: :x

Or, could be anything. Dad, I'm sleepy/tired/cold/hot/bored/whatever.

Like most dad jokes, the only person amused by them is Dad.
A fool thinks himself to be wise, but a wise man knows himself to be a fool.
William Shakespeare

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sparks
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Location: Friar McWallclocks Bar -- Where time stands still while you lean over!

Re: Dad jokes and humor

Post by sparks » Wed Feb 13, 2019 6:46 pm

They serve to remind the little darlings that they are not the center of the Cosmos.
You can lead them to knowledge, but you can't make them think.