Dad jokes and humor

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Abdul Alhazred
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Re: Dad jokes and humor

Post by Abdul Alhazred » Tue Aug 20, 2019 3:18 am

Reddit?

If you were born after 1945 then you were literally named after Hitler.
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Giz
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Re: Dad jokes and humor

Post by Giz » Tue Aug 20, 2019 1:47 pm

Abdul Alhazred wrote:
Tue Aug 20, 2019 3:18 am
Reddit?

If you were born after 1945 then you were literally named after Hitler.
Haven’t seen that one before- nice

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ceptimus
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Re: Dad jokes and humor

Post by ceptimus » Tue Aug 20, 2019 10:20 pm

To be a horse rider, or not to be a horse rider: that is equestrianism.

Reported as one of the runner-up jokes from this year's Edinburgh Fringe.

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Doctor X
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Re: Dad jokes and humor

Post by Doctor X » Mon Aug 26, 2019 4:15 am

The Fringe is getting slack.

–J.D.
Mob of the Mean: Free beanie, cattle-prod and Charley Fan Club!
"Doctor X is just treating you the way he treats everyone--as subhuman crap too dumb to breathe in after you breathe out."--Don
DocX: FTW.--sparks
"Doctor X wins again."--Pyrrho
"Never sorry to make a racist Fucktard cry."--His Humble MagNIfIcence
"It was the criticisms of Doc X, actually, that let me see more clearly how far the hypocrisy had gone."--clarsct
"I'd leave it up to Doctor X who has been a benevolent tyrant so far."--Grammatron
"Indeed you are a river to your people.
Shit. That's going to end up in your sig."--Pyrrho
"Try a twelve step program and accept Doctor X as your High Power."--asthmatic camel
"just like Doc X said." --gnome

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Anaxagoras
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Re: Dad jokes and humor

Post by Anaxagoras » Thu Aug 29, 2019 9:07 am

"I have some good news and some bad news for you."

~Schrodinger's vet
A fool thinks himself to be wise, but a wise man knows himself to be a fool.
William Shakespeare

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robinson
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Re: Dad jokes and humor

Post by robinson » Thu Aug 29, 2019 11:31 pm

The vet came in holding my dog.

He said "I have to put him down"

"What?" I cried out. "Why"

































He's really heavy
You never know what's going to happen, then some shit happens nobody saw coming, then later somebody says they knew it was coming, then some new shit happens nobody saw coming, rinse and repeat

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Giz
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Re: Dad jokes and humor

Post by Giz » Fri Aug 30, 2019 12:29 am

Ah, tommy Cooper!

For the benefit of non-brits a collection of his offerings (the finest “dad jokes”)!

http://www.mkccc.com/humour/t.htm

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Anaxagoras
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Re: Dad jokes and humor

Post by Anaxagoras » Fri Aug 30, 2019 3:34 am

Yeah, those are some corny jokes.

The meta-joke is that the jokes are so bad.
A fool thinks himself to be wise, but a wise man knows himself to be a fool.
William Shakespeare

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Doctor X
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Re: Dad jokes and humor

Post by Doctor X » Fri Aug 30, 2019 6:48 am

Image

Image

–J.D.
Mob of the Mean: Free beanie, cattle-prod and Charley Fan Club!
"Doctor X is just treating you the way he treats everyone--as subhuman crap too dumb to breathe in after you breathe out."--Don
DocX: FTW.--sparks
"Doctor X wins again."--Pyrrho
"Never sorry to make a racist Fucktard cry."--His Humble MagNIfIcence
"It was the criticisms of Doc X, actually, that let me see more clearly how far the hypocrisy had gone."--clarsct
"I'd leave it up to Doctor X who has been a benevolent tyrant so far."--Grammatron
"Indeed you are a river to your people.
Shit. That's going to end up in your sig."--Pyrrho
"Try a twelve step program and accept Doctor X as your High Power."--asthmatic camel
"just like Doc X said." --gnome

ImageWS CHAMPIONS X4!!!! ImageNBA CHAMPIONS!! Stanley Cup!Image SB CHAMPIONS X6!!!!!! Image

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Rob Lister
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Re: Dad jokes and humor

Post by Rob Lister » Sat Aug 31, 2019 10:10 am

The shortest distance between two jokes is a straight line.

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Anaxagoras
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Re: Dad jokes and humor

Post by Anaxagoras » Sun Oct 20, 2019 5:11 am

What do you get if you divide a pumpkin's circumference by its diameter?
Spoiler:
Pumpkin π
Lay that one on your kids when you carve the jack-o-lanterns. :P
A fool thinks himself to be wise, but a wise man knows himself to be a fool.
William Shakespeare

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ceptimus
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Re: Dad jokes and humor

Post by ceptimus » Sun Oct 20, 2019 6:42 pm

How do you get a bunch of Pikachu onto a bus?
Spoiler:
Pokémon