The Wisdom of a Lifetime

This is our lounge area. Feel free to come in and get acquainted!
User avatar
Bruce
Posts: 20383
Joined: Wed Jun 09, 2004 11:46 pm
Title: Bruce of all Bruces
Location: Massachusetts

The Wisdom of a Lifetime

Post by Bruce »

This is the thread to share your life lessons and tidbits of wisdom.

Here's mine:

In the vast majority of situations that life throws at you, the best thing you can do to prevent things from getting worse is keep your fecking mouth shut.
Such potential!

User avatar
asthmatic camel
Posts: 19343
Joined: Sat Jun 05, 2004 1:53 pm
Title: Forum commie nun.
Location: Stirring the porridge with my spurtle.

Re: The Wisdom of a Lifetime

Post by asthmatic camel »

Here's mine:

In the vast majority of situations that life throws at you, the best thing you can do to prevent things from getting worse is to kick the living daylights out of some cunt who's really irritated you. Out of sight of cameras and police officers.
Shit happens. The older you get, the more often shit happens. So you have to try not to give a shit even when you do. Because, if you give too many shits, you've created your own shit creek and there's no way out other than swimming through the shit. Oh, and fuck.

Nyarlathotep
Posts: 49386
Joined: Fri Jun 04, 2004 2:50 pm

Re: The Wisdom of a Lifetime

Post by Nyarlathotep »

asthmatic camel wrote:
Fri Jul 26, 2019 2:06 am
Here's mine:

In the vast majority of situations that life throws at you, the best thing you can do to prevent things from getting worse is to kick the living daylights out of some cunt who's really irritated you. Out of sight of cameras and police officers.

I like the way you think

User avatar
Bruce
Posts: 20383
Joined: Wed Jun 09, 2004 11:46 pm
Title: Bruce of all Bruces
Location: Massachusetts

Re: The Wisdom of a Lifetime

Post by Bruce »

It is more fun to give out bad advice and watch to see what happens. I guess that's why people become consultants.
Such potential!

User avatar
shemp
Posts: 6540
Joined: Thu Jun 10, 2004 12:16 pm
Title: inbred shit-for-brains
Location: Planet X

Re: The Wisdom of a Lifetime

Post by shemp »

Never open a can. It might be a can of worms.
"It is not I who is mad! It is I who is crazy!" -- Ren Hoek

"what dicking deep shit i produce" -- pillory

Freedom of choice
Is what you got
Freedom from choice
Is what you want

People are shitting themselves to death
Crap so much they fail to take a breath
But even when their kids are starvin'
They thought Trump would throw them Charmin.

Nyarlathotep
Posts: 49386
Joined: Fri Jun 04, 2004 2:50 pm

Re: The Wisdom of a Lifetime

Post by Nyarlathotep »

Knowing is half the battle.

The other half is violence

User avatar
Witness
Posts: 28287
Joined: Thu Sep 19, 2013 5:50 pm

Re: The Wisdom of a Lifetime

Post by Witness »

Ah, oh, hum…

Perhaps an unpopular opinion, but I learned early on that laziness is always rewarded.

Then I read the (allegedly Chinese) saying that laziness sharpens the wits.

And I was sold. :P

User avatar
Pyrrho
Posts: 29587
Joined: Sat Jun 05, 2004 2:17 am
Title: Man in Black
Location: Division 6

Re: The Wisdom of a Lifetime

Post by Pyrrho »

Ignore everybody.
The flash of light you saw in the sky was not a UFO. Swamp gas from a weather balloon was trapped in a thermal pocket and reflected the light from Venus.

shuize
Posts: 2529
Joined: Tue Nov 14, 2017 4:32 am

Re: The Wisdom of a Lifetime

Post by shuize »

It's taken me a long time (and I still don't do it all that well) but I'm starting to realize that I don't really need to let things bother me.

Of course, it's a lot easier to say this now that I've got a little money in the bank.
"Don't trust China. China is asshoe."

User avatar
asthmatic camel
Posts: 19343
Joined: Sat Jun 05, 2004 1:53 pm
Title: Forum commie nun.
Location: Stirring the porridge with my spurtle.

Re: The Wisdom of a Lifetime

Post by asthmatic camel »

Were it currently possible, I'd transfer my mind into the cloud and allow Mrs. Camel to turn me off whenever I get on her tits.
Shit happens. The older you get, the more often shit happens. So you have to try not to give a shit even when you do. Because, if you give too many shits, you've created your own shit creek and there's no way out other than swimming through the shit. Oh, and fuck.

User avatar
Doctor X
Posts: 72487
Joined: Fri Jun 04, 2004 8:09 pm
Title: Collective Messiah
Location: Your Mom

Re: The Wisdom of a Lifetime

Post by Doctor X »

Everything makes sense; you just need to know why.

--J.D.
Mob of the Mean: Free beanie, cattle-prod and Charley Fan Club!
"Doctor X is just treating you the way he treats everyone--as subhuman crap too dumb to breathe in after you breathe out." – Don
DocX: FTW. – sparks
"Doctor X wins again." – Pyrrho
"Never sorry to make a racist Fucktard cry." – His Humble MagNIfIcence
"It was the criticisms of Doc X, actually, that let me see more clearly how far the hypocrisy had gone." – clarsct
"I'd leave it up to Doctor X who has been a benevolent tyrant so far." – Grammatron
"Indeed you are a river to your people.
Shit. That's going to end up in your sig." – Pyrrho
"Try a twelve step program and accept Doctor X as your High Power." – asthmatic camel
"just like Doc X said." – gnome

ImageWS CHAMPIONS X4!!!! ImageNBA CHAMPIONS!! Stanley Cup!Image SB CHAMPIONS X6!!!!!! Image

User avatar
asthmatic camel
Posts: 19343
Joined: Sat Jun 05, 2004 1:53 pm
Title: Forum commie nun.
Location: Stirring the porridge with my spurtle.

Re: The Wisdom of a Lifetime

Post by asthmatic camel »

Doctor X wrote:
Fri Jul 26, 2019 5:59 pm
Everything makes sense; you just need to know why.

--J.D.
You reckon? Try telling Mrs. Camel that vitamin pills are a waste of money and that God doesn't exist.

:De_Bunk:
Shit happens. The older you get, the more often shit happens. So you have to try not to give a shit even when you do. Because, if you give too many shits, you've created your own shit creek and there's no way out other than swimming through the shit. Oh, and fuck.

User avatar
asthmatic camel
Posts: 19343
Joined: Sat Jun 05, 2004 1:53 pm
Title: Forum commie nun.
Location: Stirring the porridge with my spurtle.

Re: The Wisdom of a Lifetime

Post by asthmatic camel »

Think carefully about your wife when her birthday/wedding anniversary/Christmas approaches and buy her fuck all.

It'll save money and avoid rows because you've bought the wrong fucking thing, however hard you've tried.
Shit happens. The older you get, the more often shit happens. So you have to try not to give a shit even when you do. Because, if you give too many shits, you've created your own shit creek and there's no way out other than swimming through the shit. Oh, and fuck.

User avatar
ed
Posts: 38403
Joined: Tue Jun 08, 2004 11:52 pm
Title: G_D

Re: The Wisdom of a Lifetime

Post by ed »

Nothing really matters very much except the people closest to you.
And, even then, if you and your kid are being chased by a bear, you would do well to trip the little ingrate so that you can make your escape.

In 100 years your name won't even be remembered. The pitiful inheritance you left to your family, or the home for stray cats, will long since have been dissipated.

Endow something "in perpetuity"? Awwwwww ... you are so cute when you show your gullible side:
“I asked him, How long is ‘in perpetuity’?”

“For you, 50 years,” Mr. de Montebello, the museum director, replied.
So enjoy yourself, you go around exactly once, don't fuck anyone over just for lulz and relax.
About that stereo

User avatar
asthmatic camel
Posts: 19343
Joined: Sat Jun 05, 2004 1:53 pm
Title: Forum commie nun.
Location: Stirring the porridge with my spurtle.

Re: The Wisdom of a Lifetime

Post by asthmatic camel »

Miserable cunt.

Fuck everyone who deserves it over for shits, giggles and grins.

There's no Hell, so you might as well.
Shit happens. The older you get, the more often shit happens. So you have to try not to give a shit even when you do. Because, if you give too many shits, you've created your own shit creek and there's no way out other than swimming through the shit. Oh, and fuck.

User avatar
ed
Posts: 38403
Joined: Tue Jun 08, 2004 11:52 pm
Title: G_D

Re: The Wisdom of a Lifetime

Post by ed »

Well, if they're French...
About that stereo

User avatar
Bruce
Posts: 20383
Joined: Wed Jun 09, 2004 11:46 pm
Title: Bruce of all Bruces
Location: Massachusetts

Re: The Wisdom of a Lifetime

Post by Bruce »

asthmatic camel wrote:
Fri Jul 26, 2019 10:17 pm
Miserable cunt.

Fuck everyone who deserves it over for shits, giggles and grins.

There's no Hell, so you might as well.
What if you're not a psychopath and get no joy or satisfaction out of fucking over other people, even if they deserve it? What if fucking over other people just makes you feel like a piece of shit and gives you anxiety because you know that retaliation is coming because it always does?
Such potential!

User avatar
asthmatic camel
Posts: 19343
Joined: Sat Jun 05, 2004 1:53 pm
Title: Forum commie nun.
Location: Stirring the porridge with my spurtle.

Re: The Wisdom of a Lifetime

Post by asthmatic camel »

Bruce wrote:
Fri Jul 26, 2019 11:27 pm
asthmatic camel wrote:
Fri Jul 26, 2019 10:17 pm
Miserable cunt.

Fuck everyone who deserves it over for shits, giggles and grins.

There's no Hell, so you might as well.
What if you're not a psychopath and get no joy or satisfaction out of fucking over other people, even if they deserve it? What if fucking over other people just makes you feel like a piece of shit and gives you anxiety because you know that retaliation is coming because it always does?
Perhaps you could start being a psychopath in easy stages and see how it goes. You know, like stealing the bosses lunch from the office fridge.
Shit happens. The older you get, the more often shit happens. So you have to try not to give a shit even when you do. Because, if you give too many shits, you've created your own shit creek and there's no way out other than swimming through the shit. Oh, and fuck.

User avatar
Grammatron
Posts: 35074
Joined: Tue Jun 08, 2004 1:21 am
Location: Los Angeles, CA

Re: The Wisdom of a Lifetime

Post by Grammatron »

Know your worth

User avatar
Doctor X
Posts: 72487
Joined: Fri Jun 04, 2004 8:09 pm
Title: Collective Messiah
Location: Your Mom

Re: The Wisdom of a Lifetime

Post by Doctor X »

Image

What?

--J.D.
Mob of the Mean: Free beanie, cattle-prod and Charley Fan Club!
"Doctor X is just treating you the way he treats everyone--as subhuman crap too dumb to breathe in after you breathe out." – Don
DocX: FTW. – sparks
"Doctor X wins again." – Pyrrho
"Never sorry to make a racist Fucktard cry." – His Humble MagNIfIcence
"It was the criticisms of Doc X, actually, that let me see more clearly how far the hypocrisy had gone." – clarsct
"I'd leave it up to Doctor X who has been a benevolent tyrant so far." – Grammatron
"Indeed you are a river to your people.
Shit. That's going to end up in your sig." – Pyrrho
"Try a twelve step program and accept Doctor X as your High Power." – asthmatic camel
"just like Doc X said." – gnome

ImageWS CHAMPIONS X4!!!! ImageNBA CHAMPIONS!! Stanley Cup!Image SB CHAMPIONS X6!!!!!! Image