Are Chinese Mothers Superior?

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Anaxagoras
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Are Chinese Mothers Superior?

Post by Anaxagoras »

Why Chinese Mothers Are Superior -By AMY CHUA
A lot of people wonder how Chinese parents raise such stereotypically successful kids. They wonder what these parents do to produce so many math whizzes and music prodigies, what it's like inside the family, and whether they could do it too. Well, I can tell them, because I've done it. Here are some things my daughters, Sophia and Louisa, were never allowed to do:

• attend a sleepover

• have a playdate

• be in a school play

• complain about not being in a school play

• watch TV or play computer games

• choose their own extracurricular activities

• get any grade less than an A

• not be the No. 1 student in every subject except gym and drama

• play any instrument other than the piano or violin

• not play the piano or violin.
I'm speechless. :weirdeyes:

There's also an online poll:
Which style of parenting is best for children?
Permissive Western parenting
Demanding Eastern parenting
No "planet X" option I'm afraid.
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grayman
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Re: Are Chinese Mothers Superior?

Post by grayman »

Chinese Mother Superior.

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Abdul Alhazred
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Re: Are Chinese Mothers Superior?

Post by Abdul Alhazred »

not play the piano or violin.
I don't get this one.
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Rob Lister
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Re: Are Chinese Mothers Superior?

Post by Rob Lister »

grayman wrote:Chinese Mother Superior.

http://albayworld.com/images/madreSup.jpg
I just got what you did there. slick.

But to the original question: To answer if it is superior, you have to pick a metric. Happiness isn't a good metric. well-adjusted isn't a good one. future income is a good one but by no means the only one...i just can't think of another.

I'll bet (no evidence other than my observation) the asian (not necessarily or even likely chinese) kids that do so [stereotypically] well are almost always first generation. Are they in turn likely to raise their kids in the same manner? Either way, that's a metric of sorts. Will they resent their parents? That could be a metric too if we could quantify it.

Do the [asian] parents that didn't migrate to the western world do the same? If they do, it isn't all that evident that it is a superior method if you're using future income as a metric.

pick a metric.

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Re: Are Chinese Mothers Superior?

Post by gnome »

Avoiding TV and pushing for the best grades are certainly correlated with future success, but some of the others I really doubt have a causal relationship. If there is a correlation it's because the same parents that deny sleepovers and "play dates" tend also to push for more studying. But that isn't a necessary component.

So only one student can be #1 in a class. Does that mean that only one parent can be a non-failure?
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Re: Are Chinese Mothers Superior?

Post by Philip »

Abdul Alhazred wrote:
not play the piano or violin.
I don't get this one.
Chinese kids as she describes them are never allowed to not play the piano or violin. I guess the parents think playing the piano or violin is essential for intellectual development.
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Re: Are Chinese Mothers Superior?

Post by Anaxagoras »

Philip wrote:
Abdul Alhazred wrote:
not play the piano or violin.
I don't get this one.
Chinese kids as she describes them are never allowed to not play the piano or violin. I guess the parents think playing the piano or violin is essential for intellectual development.
Or maybe "played piano at Carnegie Hall" looks good on a college application.

Somehow I think that's the lens she sees it through.

(Scroll down for the picture of "Sophia playing at Carnegie Hall in 2007.")
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Re: Are Chinese Mothers Superior?

Post by Anaxagoras »

gnome wrote:So only one student can be #1 in a class. Does that mean that only one parent can be a non-failure?
Vince Lombardi: "Winning isn't everything, it's the only thing." If you're not No. 1, you're just a loser with no value as a human being.
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Anaxagoras
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Re: Are Chinese Mothers Superior?

Post by Anaxagoras »

Here's another one from this genre:
Harvard Girl

These ones made their daughter hold ice cubes in her hands until they turned purple to "build character."
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Re: Are Chinese Mothers Superior?

Post by sparks »

Fuck. Ice cubes fer chrissakes. There is no end to the woo. All races are susceptible.
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Re: Are Chinese Mothers Superior?

Post by En folkefiende »

Well, let me see, I'm a hill jack married to a chinese person.

Do I detect some totally BS stereotypes in the article? Hmm.

Yeah. Just a FEW .... Like most of it.

I'll also add some anecdotal, but rather consistant experience of mine.

When I was in college, I was a campus cop for 3 years (give or take). In that time, I found that one could almost separate students into two classes, those who had been rigidly controlled by parents, and those who hadn't.

Most of those who hadn't continued on at school just like they usually did, without engaging in excess.

A high percentage of those who went wonky, though, seemed to come from controlling backgrounds, if the phone calls and other evidence has any meaning.

No, it's not anything more than anecdotal, but I'm convinced that people who have already learned to run their own life during High School will continue on to do so afterwards, and those who have no idea how to run their own life may do poorly (not "will", but "may" and "more likely to") when not under another's controlling influence.

Some of my worst experiences in the job were with the more violent sort of controlling parent...
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Re: Are Chinese Mothers Superior?

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jj wrote:When I was in college, I was a campus cop for 3 years (give or take).
narc.

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Re: Are Chinese Mothers Superior?

Post by DrMatt »

piano or violin
Yo mama.
Wait, let me rephrase that.
Yoyo Ma.
there.
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Re: Are Chinese Mothers Superior?

Post by Mentat »

DrMatt wrote:
piano or violin
Yo mama.
Wait, let me rephrase that.
Yoyo Ma.
there.
I thought he played the cello.
It's "pea-can", man.

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Re: Are Chinese Mothers Superior?

Post by eli54 »

Just a big violin, isn't it?
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Re: Are Chinese Mothers Superior?

Post by DrMatt »

Mentat wrote:
DrMatt wrote:
piano or violin
Yo mama.
Wait, let me rephrase that.
Yoyo Ma.
there.
I thought he played the cello.
:clap:
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Re: Are Chinese Mothers Superior?

Post by En folkefiende »

Rob Lister wrote:
jj wrote:When I was in college, I was a campus cop for 3 years (give or take).
narc.
No, but I presume you recognize the idea from your own experience.

The job was very specifically "make sure they don't hurt themselves or anyone else, if they aren't doing that, you do not care".
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Re: Are Chinese Mothers Superior?

Post by Rob Lister »

jj wrote:
Rob Lister wrote:
jj wrote:When I was in college, I was a campus cop for 3 years (give or take).
narc.
No, but I presume you recognize the idea from your own experience.

The job was very specifically "make sure they don't hurt themselves or anyone else, if they aren't doing that, you do not care".
nanny.

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Re: Are Chinese Mothers Superior?

Post by En folkefiende »

Rob Lister wrote:
jj wrote:
Rob Lister wrote:
jj wrote:When I was in college, I was a campus cop for 3 years (give or take).
narc.
No, but I presume you recognize the idea from your own experience.

The job was very specifically "make sure they don't hurt themselves or anyone else, if they aren't doing that, you do not care".
nanny.
There were some similarities... If you call dragging drunken idiots out of the middle of Forbes Avenue (them in their underwear) in the middle of a Pittsburg winter, and taking them to the hospital for a combination of alcohol poisoning and hypothermia being a nanny. Good thing I turned into a dispatcher when they found out I could type fast.
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