The NFL "Sorry to Make You Cry" Challenge XIII

gnome · Post by **gnome** » Sun Feb 04, 2018 3:38 pm

Eagles

WildCat · Post by **WildCat** » Sun Feb 04, 2018 6:08 pm

Patriots.

And if they win it's because they cheated again and gave the Eagles the flu.

shemp · Post by **shemp** » Sun Feb 04, 2018 7:04 pm

But the real question is: WHO'S GOING TO WIN PUPPY BOWL XIV AND KITTEN BOWL V?

Doctor X · Post by **Doctor X** » Sun Feb 04, 2018 7:08 pm

--J.D.

Doctor X · Post by **Doctor X** » Sun Feb 04, 2018 7:10 pm

Super Bowl Pickies:

*NFL Schedule

--J.D.[/font]

Rob Lister · Post by **Rob Lister** » Sun Feb 04, 2018 11:20 pm

Is it too late to get in on this?

shemp · Post by **shemp** » Sun Feb 04, 2018 11:22 pm

Just in case things go badly wrong, is there a Star Trek marathon tonight?

gnome · Post by **gnome** » Sun Feb 04, 2018 11:48 pm

There's always a star trek marathon on Netflix.

Anaxagoras · Post by **Anaxagoras** » Mon Feb 05, 2018 12:06 am

Iggles score first touchdown!!!

Anaxagoras · Post by **Anaxagoras** » Mon Feb 05, 2018 1:20 am

Patriots trailing at halftime. Ha! When has that ever happened before!!

izittrue · Post by **izittrue** » Mon Feb 05, 2018 2:07 am

Where’s the defense?
Good game other than that.

Doctor X · Post by **Doctor X** » Mon Feb 05, 2018 3:13 am

Where is the play calling?

I mean, seriously.

Got to put some blame on Pats offense for some really unnecessary stupid plays. Gostowski will get shit, I am aware, but, you know, why fuck around like that on a kick-off?

Anyway . . . cannot complain after last year or the game against Seattle.

--J.D.

Anaxagoras · Post by **Anaxagoras** » Mon Feb 05, 2018 3:23 am

I guess they finally ran out of magic.

Doctor X · Post by **Doctor X** » Mon Feb 05, 2018 3:31 am

Well, no.

They could have "easily" won it if the Philly D did not finally get to Brady. Neither team's D really showed up this game. More than two minutes with a make-up non-DPI call when the Philly D was a sieve? Thought for once the Pats would have the ability to win it by having the last possession.

But give credit for the Philly D making a play much like the Pats D did against Seattle at the right time.

Where I think a lot of legitimate criticism will come down will be, like, not just taking a knee and starting on the 25 rather than fuck about and end up on your own 5. That is Pete Carroll Level Foolishness. Throwing the ball to Brady? Why? Why do that?

And that will be the problem for whomever gets Josh--he overthinks things sometimes. When you have Brady it sometimes works.

--J.D.

Carr · Post by **Carr** » Mon Feb 05, 2018 3:34 am

and a night in the box!

shemp · Post by **shemp** » Mon Feb 05, 2018 3:45 am

Red Sox equipment truck heads south in two weeks!

WHAT?

Grammatron · Post by **Grammatron** » Mon Feb 05, 2018 7:44 am

Excellent game for those who did not have a team in the Super Bowl. I think the both sides played well with very few mistakes. Patriots still almost won despite being in a whole the entire game.

Evolver · Post by **Evolver** » Mon Feb 05, 2018 1:46 pm

Grammatron wrote:Excellent game for those who did not have a team in the Super Bowl. I think the both sides played well with very few mistakes. Patriots still almost won despite being in a whole the entire game.

Agreed.

But not excellent if you like watching good defensive play, for the most part.

Doctor X · Post by **Doctor X** » Mon Feb 05, 2018 3:32 pm

Funny, I expected the Screaming Hordes of You Lost This . . . for ME!!11!Eleventys to be screaming about:

1. "Adam Veritek* I am Not" Gostkowski
2. Offensive Stupidity Gadget Plays
3. THE GOAT FUMBLED!!1!! BROADWAY JOE NO FUMBL! SAMMY BAUGH!!!1!

Nope.

They are screaming about benching Malcolm Butler. Who played not-well all year. So somehow Butler would . . . what? Neither defense could stop anything. There were two critical defensive plays:

1. Pats interception—lucky—that ended up becoming a score.
2. Eagles strip/fumble

Other than that, neither defense showed up. What “hurts” is that with about 2:40 and Brady and the ball most probably only worried if the Pats would leave too much clock for Eagles to march right back down.

Now here is a Conspiracy Theory: this was a “weirdly” ref’d game. Some “make-up calls.” All of which really did not matter. For some unfathomable reason, the Pats were NOT called for the BLATANT DPI on the two-point conversion. So, assuming Pats march right down and score, 6 points gives them the lead. WITH the 2 points, the TD + Extra Point (*cough cough* Gostkowski *cough*) it is only a tie.

Can you imagine that? Pats find a way, as they did all game, to shred the D only worried about the clock running out as in not leaving the Eagles enough time to shred them back yet again?

THE FIX WAS IN FOR THE PATS!!1!!!

Funnily enough, still assuming the same strip sack—no reason not to—the 4 points lost by Gostkowski did not actually matter. Pats would still have been down by 1, strip, Eagles FG, Pats still have to get a TD with ~1:00 left . . . same stupid play on the kick-off.

Funny ol’ game.

Cannot complain after SB 49 and 51.

--J.D.
*An "ionic" moment from the Late Boston Mayor "Mumbles" Menino.

izittrue · Post by **izittrue** » Mon Feb 05, 2018 8:39 pm

Thanks again Doc X for keeping stats for another fun season of kneeling during the my flag is bigger than your flag challenge. !!11

Grammatron · Post by **Grammatron** » Mon Feb 05, 2018 11:06 pm

Doctor X · Post by **Doctor X** » Mon Feb 05, 2018 11:31 pm

Something both NE and Phi are asking.

Something the Jags, Min, are asking.

--J.D.

shemp · Post by **shemp** » Tue Feb 06, 2018 3:06 am

izittrue wrote:Thanks again Doc X for keeping stats for another fun season of kneeling during the my flag is bigger than your flag challenge. !!11

Yes indeed, I'm already looking forward to getting my ass kicked again next year! Thanks Doc!

Anaxagoras · Post by **Anaxagoras** » Tue Feb 06, 2018 4:44 am

Early in the regular season, the New England defense seemed to be very suspect. I guess they got better as the season went on, and in the end the Patriots were one of only 5 teams that held opponents to less than 300 points in 16 games. But on any given day as the old saying goes.

Doctor X · Post by **Doctor X** » Tue Feb 06, 2018 5:42 am

Not having Butler play was probably not a "help," but that being written, Shaq Mason deciding to take a page from the Atlanta O-Line at the very wrong time was the different.

Consider this: the Pats never punted and the Eaglettes punted once.

--J.D.

Grammatron · Post by **Grammatron** » Tue Feb 06, 2018 5:54 am

30 more seconds and the Patriots might tie the game.

Doctor X · Post by **Doctor X** » Tue Feb 06, 2018 8:33 am

Yup.

As much as it "sucks" I just have to ask a Seaman and FAILcons fan.

The defense inability to stop them was painful. As it was, I am sure, for Philly fans watching a lead melt away because they could not stop the Pats.

The Brady Haters have been hilarious: Brady set records as a QB this SB . . . yet lost. It was not on him. Though it would have been interesting if either team play a defense. Some balls from both La Cage aux Folles and The Goat should have been picked or at least batted away.

I am getting sick of the "THOSE SHOULD NOT HAVE BEEN TDS!1!!" complaint even from the fairly rational. It should have been DPI on the last play of the game--that never gets called--just as the Pats should have been called on the 2 point conversion.

Though I will agree with one "Talking Head": this was not a "fluke play" loss. It came down to Philly finally making a stop. They did.

--J.D.

Grammatron · Post by **Grammatron** » Thu Feb 08, 2018 4:46 am

So like what the hell is happening with Josh McDaniels

Doctor X · Post by **Doctor X** » Thu Feb 08, 2018 5:39 am

--J.D.

Grammatron · Post by **Grammatron** » Thu Feb 08, 2018 5:43 am

You gotta at least consider that the path of the righteous man is beset on all sides by the inequities of the selfish and the tyranny of evil men.

Anaxagoras · Post by **Anaxagoras** » Thu Feb 08, 2018 6:51 am

For anyone else wondering

http://www.espn.com/nfl/story/_/id/2235 ... hange-mind

But I thought Belichick was on his way to the Giants.

Doctor X · Post by **Doctor X** » Thu Feb 08, 2018 8:03 am

Grammatron wrote:You gotta at least consider that the path of the righteous man is beset on all sides by the inequities of the selfish and the tyranny of evil men.

I never gave much thought to it.

I just felt it was some cold shit to say before I put a cap in someone's ass.

But, Gram, you're the Weak!

--J. "I'm Trying Hard . . . Hard . . . to be the Good Shepherd!" D.

P.S.

Grammatron · Post by **Grammatron** » Fri Feb 09, 2018 4:16 am

For a drunken rant at a Super Bowl parade, this is epic and eloquent.

Jason Kelce's instantly legendary speech (NSFW)

Doctor X · Post by **Doctor X** » Fri Feb 09, 2018 7:25 am

Super Bowl Championship Round Standings:

216 Evolver NO (15), Hou (4), GB (7), LaC (9), KC (14), Ten (15), Phi (39), LaR (15), Pit (17), Jac (24), Car (13), Buf (9), MP (2), Min (14), NE (15)

201 Enchantress NYG (3), Phi (39), Hou (4), Was (7), Den (5), Buf (11), Ten (15), NO (15), ATL (16), IRB (5), Min (23), LaR (15) , Car (11), Jac (12), MP (1), NE (15)

191.5 shemp Sea (9), GB (7), Hou (4), ATL (16), Mia (6), Bal (11.5), LaR (15), MP (2), Pit (17), Buf (11), Phi (39), Car (11), Ten (10), ItR (2), Jac (12)

186.5 Radrick Sea (9), Det (11.5), Was (7), Hou (4), Jac (24), ATL (16), NO (15), Phi (39), LaR (15), Buf (11), ItR (4), Ten (10), MP (2), NE (15)
185 Anaxagoras NYJ (5), Min (23), Hou (4), Dal (9), Ten (15), NO (15), Car (13), Pit (17), ATL (16), Phi (39), Buf (9), MP (1), NE (15)

172.5 Pyrrho NO (15), Hou (4), Was (7), Det (11.5), Car (13), ATL (16), LaC (9), Cin (7), Buf (11), Sea (9), Pit (17), Ten (15), GB (7), ItR (2), LaR (11), Min (14)

167 Doctor X NYG (3), Hou (4), Min (23), MP (9), Was (7), Buf (11), Dal (9), NO (15), Car (13), ItR (7), Sea (9), ATL (16), LaR (15), Ten (10), Jac (12)

139 Wildcat Dal (9), Was (7), Hou (4), ATL (16), Mia (6), GB (7), Min (23), MP (1), Pit (17), Car (13), Buf (9), Ten (10), ItR (2), NE (15)
137 Grammatron Sea (9), Ind (4), Cin (7), Min (23), Chi (5), Dal (9), NO (15), LaC (9), Ten (15), ItR (7), LaR (15), NE (15)
121 izittrue GB (7), Oak (6), Car (13), KC (14), Den (5), LaR (15), NO (15), ATL (16), ItR (7), Buf (9), Ten (10), IJB (345), AJPP (-345)
114.5 gnome Sea (9), GB (7), Hou (4), ATL (16), KC (14), Ten (15), Bal (11.5), Car (13), LaR (11), Min (14)

59.5 Mentat Det (11.5), TB (5), ATL (16), Den (5), Mia (6), Hou (4), Sea (9), MP (1), ItR (2)

As always, check my math . . . yes, you may use your fingers. . . .

Evolver Ask Enchantress, "Can You Take a Photo of Me on a Horse?"

--J. "Looky Looky! A Little Keepsake for You Guys!" D.

Evolver · Post by **Evolver** » Fri Feb 09, 2018 7:08 pm

Good game, everyone. This seemed like a strange year.

As reigning champion I select as next year's theme:
Spinal Tap - including
The original movie: This Is Spinal Tap
The 3 albums by the band
The soon-to-be-released solo album by Derek Smalls "Smalls Change (Meditations Upon Ageing)"
The Spinal Tap Christmas Holiday Spectacular TV special
The surgical procedure

Grammatron · Post by **Grammatron** » Fri Feb 09, 2018 7:09 pm

Yes but how many drummers?

Doctor X · Post by **Doctor X** » Fri Feb 09, 2018 8:58 pm

So it is written!

So let it be done!

And to answer the question?

ALL OF THEM!!1!!

--J.D.

Doctor X · Post by **Doctor X** » Fri Feb 09, 2018 10:37 pm

--J.D.

gnome · Post by **gnome** » Sat Feb 10, 2018 12:20 am

Hey do we have a record of past winners somewhere?

I know, I know. The search function.

Pyrrho · Post by **Pyrrho** » Sat Feb 10, 2018 1:20 am

I supPOSE someone could cajole Captain into making an NFL Sorry to Make You Cry subforum and moving all of the Challenge threads there.

Forum sprawl.