The leadership in my division of the company is now dominated by women. Old, grouchy, vindictive, manipulative, irrational, and micro-managing women. All of them are like Mrs. Bruce, with varying degrees of insanity. My boss, my boss's boss, and now the boss of my boss's boss are women. Two women report to me. The two client's I report to are women. The two project managers I work with are women. They all hate each other. They all expect me to fix their problems, meet their demands, fight their battles, put up with their bullshit, reach things on the top shelf, open jars, etc. None of them are a pleasure to be around. I'm stuck in the middle, trying to please all parties and avoid being on the top of shit lists, all day long. I come home every day, barely holding on to my last nerve, and the first thing I get to deal with upon entering the door is Mrs. Bruce, usually demanding that I deal with The Boy. Then I get to spend the whole weekend reporting to the biggest boss, Mrs. Bruce.
Brucetta is the only female left in my life that makes it all better. She saw I was having a bad day yesterday and asked if I needed a hug. Hell yes, I needed a hug. That's golden stuff right there. She's 15 now and still daddy's girl. She's the only bright spot in my day.
Funny, I used to like women. Even desire some of them. Those days are long gone. I look at young women now and all I see are children on grown women's bodies, or old women in training. I think my last drop of testosterone disappeared about 10 years ago, and with it my last drop of hope. I don't even know how I'm hanging on. Seems like I should be suicidal, or going through mid-life crisis, or checking into a loony bin, but somehow,I keep walking that thin line, towing the weight, trudging through the trenches. I feel no fear or worry anymore. All I feel is a blank mix if pain, irritation, and a hope that someday it will all end quickly. I don't want to see it coming. Maybe i'll get stuck by lightning or a meteor will hit me in the back of my head.
Sorry for the dreary post. Just needed to get it out. I'm fine, no worries. Still reasonably healthy and able to load my 16-tons per day.
